Messy Journey

Dear friends,
I am super excited to share this with you. TODAY is BOOK LAUNCH DAY for  Messy Journey, How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home  (New Hope Publishers)! 

This book is my heart and soul. 

At times it was agonizing to write because it is about struggle. A relationship struggle. A faith and fear wresting match. Messy Journey is personal,  And to be honest, I'm a fairly private person yet the content of this book demanded openness and transparency.  God moved me  forward with the knowledge that this material could help and encourage another family. The stories in Messy Journey are not just mine but many others who bravely shared their lives.Some parents, some prodigals, some former prodigals. My daughter, Courtney, courageously tells her journey as well. Each of these individuals are my heroes. Motivated by the power of love they share their most private thoughts and feelings in order to touch the lives of those reading this book.  If you have a prodigal you are not alone. 

Here's a little blurb about the book: 

Messy Journey:
How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home

Messy Journey is for parents walking the difficult road with a wayward child. With rare and raw honesty, author and licensed parent and family educator, Lori Wildenberg, her daughter (Courtney), other parents and prodigals vulnerably share their stories. No matter why you have a prodigal or if you love someone who does this book will bring comfort, help, and encouragement.  Practical grace- and truth-filled ways of navigating your relationship with a detoured child who is rejecting faith, dabbling in sin, or wholeheartedly embracing sinful behavior are given. There is hope. After all, their struggle isn't really with you, it's with God.

Messy Journey offers the tools of grace and truth to construct a bridge that offers the  prodigal a way back to the family and to God. Nothing holds a parent's heart hostage like a prodigal. This book provides much needed hope, support, and encouragement to the mom or dad who feels alone on what can be a very solitary journey.  

Final Thought: 


If you have a prodigal or know someone who does, this book will be a blessing. Please connect with me if you would like me (or Courtney and me) to speak to your church group about either  general prodigal struggles (Messy Journey) or if you'd prefer a more specific talk regarding homosexuality, faith, and the family (When Belief and Behavior Collide: How to love your LGBT family member or friend with grace and truth ). 

With faith, hope, and love, 

~Lori

Lori Wildenberg is a  licensed parent and family

Click here to get to Amazon

educator, co-founder of  1Corinthians13Parenting.com,

 Lori's newest book, Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home (New Hope Publishers) can be ordered on Amazon or found at your favorite bookstore. If you are a parent of a child who has strayed or know a family in this situation, this book will provide comfort, help, and hope.
Click here to   Contact Lori to speak at your next event. She is also available for parent consulting and parent training courses. Lori can also be found mentoring over at  MOMS Together community on Facebook. 

Head over to Amazon to get your copy of Raising Little Kids with Big Love  

or Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love. 

A Dangerous Combo

Have you noticed how some of our Christmas tree decorations are markers of times in our lives? So maybe it was the putting away of Christmas ornaments (specifically the apple ornament with the words, "World's Greatest Teacher" -Of course I love that one!)  caused this memory to resurface in my mind. 

Prior to having four kids, I taught elementary school.

“Who has sharing today?” First graders are great; full of imagination, energy, enthusiasm, innocence, and love.

A number of hands shot up in the air. I jotted down the names of the children attached to the raised arms.  While surveying the class to make certain I did not miss anyone, I noticed Randy. 

“Randy, did you want to share today?”

 “Ya, but I have my sharing in my locker.”

 “That’s okay, you can go out into the hall and get it.”

Randy left the classroom to retrieve the item he was planning on sharing. Empty handed, he quietly came back into room and slipped into his chair. 

Puzzled, I called him over to my desk.

"Did you accidentally leave your sharing at home?’’ I gently asked, knowing he was upset.

“No, I brought it this morning and it’s not there.”

 “Go back and look through your backpack again.” He complied and walked slowly toward the door.

 My heart hurt for him, so I added,  “If you forgot, that’s just fine you can share next week.” 

When he reentered the room, I could see he still didn’t have the item he was planning on presenting. He approached my desk and reiterated that he definitely brought his truck to school for show and tell. I quizzed him on its description. 

“It’s this big,” He spread his hands about 12 inches apart. “It’s red with three missiles on the top. The missiles even shoot.”

Poor guy.It must have been an expensive toy and now someone has taken it. His face was downcast.  My resolve was clear.

“Randy, I’ll look into this.  Don’t worry. I also want you to look for your truck when you get home, just in case it’s there.”

“Could it have ended up in another locker by mistake?”  After school, I checked all of my students’ lockers. No red truck.

The next day I asked him if he had found his truck.

“Nope." He was so distraught he couldn't even make eye contact with me. That afternoon I broadened my search.  I asked permission to quickly look through the rest of the school lockers but to no avail. I spoke with the principal about my frustration regarding the missing truck. He was equally moved. He said he would make an announcement over the P.A. system. The principal was careful to use the public address system strictly for school related business. I was so grateful he was willing to help out my first grader.

He was true to his word and made the announcement regarding the missing red truck with missiles on the top the following school day. When Friday rolled around, I called Randy’s parents to let them know their son’s expensive truck was still missing. I conveyed my apology and frustration over not being able to be of more help in locating the special truck.  I only heard silence on the other end of the phone. I thought Randy's mom was really angry about the disappearing truck.

Finally she said, “ He doesn’t have a truck like that.”

Confused, I re-described the toy.   

“Nope, he does not have a truck like that.” (Now looking back from a mom point of view, I think she had also caught the embarrassment virus!)

I morphed from confusion to embarrassment to FULL-ON dread. I was totally taken in by a 6-year-old's imagination, innocent face, and story. 

RATS...I needed to fess up to my principal. 

Armed with doughnuts, an explanation, and an apology, I entered my principal’s office. He was quiet for a few minutes, thinking back over his missing truck announcement  projected over the entire school’s PA system. 

I held my breath for his response. 

He shook his head and began to laugh!    

After this little experience, I learned that teachers and parents can't always believe everything a child says. My sister, also a teacher, with humor makes a deal with the parents of her students."I won't be believe everything your child says about you. If you don't believe everything your child says about me." 

So, of you hear some crazy stuff from your child, remember he has an imagination and a sin nature (quite the dangerous combo) so always check things out before jumping to a conclusion. 

With faith, hope, and love,

Lori

Have you ever been taken in by one of your kids? 

In everything set them an example by doing what is good. 

Titus 2: 7a

Amazing Grace

Ignoring trespassing signs can  be serious business. One teen fisherman and his friend learned this the hard way. They crossed over onto private property, noticing but choosing to ignore the warning signs. The boys had a great time catching and releasing the fish. The neighborhood pond was very well stocked!

Then, the game warden arrived.

OOPS.

The officer had it in his power to let the young men off with a warning but he didn't. He chose to write a ticket.

The one who holds the power is the one who decides how to implement it. 
Maybe if the boys had a relationship with this man, he may have given them a pass. They didn't. So he didn't.

No mercy. No grace.

Personally I have tossed my line into the water when I know I shouldn't. I am also guilty of ignoring the warning sings. John Newton says, "I am a great sinner in need of a great savior." I am in the same boat.

What if I got what I deserved? 

Punishment. Condemnation.

But instead I get what I don't deserve.

Mercy. Grace.

I can't earn grace. I can't expect mercy. But what I do have is a relationship with the one who lived the life I should have lived and died the death I should have died. He is the authority and judge.

I am thankful that the one who judges me is also the one who loves me. I'm thankful for the mercy and grace I have received.

As a mom, I try and remember God's perfect balance between justice and mercy, and truth and grace. There are times I may institute a more severe sentence for trespasses than necessary or let someone off the hook (so to speak) when it would have been wiser to implement a consequence. In the case of the fisherman, they would have learned the lesson without the big penalty.

In wrath remember mercy. 

Habakkuk 3:2

Have there been times in your parenting where you doled out a deserved yet bigger punishment than necessary? Or when you needed to reinforce a life lesson and you let it go?  When have you been able to show and teach grace and mercy in your home without forgetting about truth and justice?

By,
Lori Wildenberg
Contact Lori for your next event.
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