Readers,
During the month of December you were introduced to 4 women and men with 4 new books for moms and dads. I've been excited to share each one with you. I want to bring you the best of the best! And... during this time my wrist has been healing (YAY) from my November car accident. Today I have a bonus writer for you. Meet Cindi McMenamin. She is helping us start off 2015 with five helpful goals for marriage.
I'll be back next week.
With faith, hope and love,
Lori
PS If you are doing the free four week New Start '15 Bible Study, Check these links for this weeks blogs and readings:
PS If you are doing the free four week New Start '15 Bible Study, Check these links for this weeks blogs and readings:
5 Ways to
Grow Closer to Your Spouse in 2015
By Cindi
McMenamin
I've always been a goal-setter.
Every
January I would come up with new goals to save more money, be more productive
on my job, read more books, lose more weight, and basically get in better shape
mentally, physically, financially, and spiritually.
I was just missing one area.
What was I
doing to get in better shape, relationally, with my husband?
Convicted at where my priorities were, I realized
that I needed to intentionally invest in my marriage just as much as I was
investing in other areas of my life. And that meant setting tangible goals
yearly in that area, too.
So ...I let my
husband, Hugh, in on the goal-making process by asking him a few
non-threatening questions. From those questions, we ended up setting our yearly
goals together, which we've done now for the past ten years or so.
I initiated our goal-setting process by
asking my husband these three questions:
1. What do you wish we could do as a
couple that we rarely or no longer take the time to do?
2. What have you always wanted to do
together that we haven't yet done?
3. What, specifically, would you like to
see us accomplish together in the next year?
My husband's answers to those questions
opened up a whole new arena -- and adventure -- of yearly goal-setting together.
And because I took the time -- and initiative -- to be deliberate and
intentional in asking him what things he would like to see changed or improved
upon in our marriage, I actually had a place to start (instead of just feeling
like maybe he was unhappy or maybe there was more to our relationship that we
were failing to discover).
We also ended up incorporating into our
lives some things like a weekly day to play, projects we've long talked about and
finally accomplished together, and trips we've planned and taken that we might
not otherwise have even talked about.
I encourage you to ask your spouse those
questions above and then come up with some goals of your own for 2015. But if
that's too big of a step for now, or if you're frustrated at being the one who
has to initiate a closer connection, here's a place to start -- five simple
goals for a closer connection in the next year:
1.
Start your day with a kiss. Simple, but effective. Studies show couples who kiss each other
daily (even a quick peck on the cheek) are happier, overall, than couples who
don't.
2.
Say encouraging words.
It doesn't take a lot of effort, but it reaps marvelous results. Ephesians 4:29
says "Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will
be an encouragement to those who hear them (NLT)." Think in terms of
"I'm only going to say it if my spouse is encouraged by it." You'll
notice, within days, how your relationship improves.
3.
Plan
a regular date night. If you have
children and can rarely afford a babysitter, find another couple in the same situation
and exchange babysitting once a month so each couple can have a monthly date
night. Dating was important before you
were married and believe us, it's even more important after you're married.
4.
Read through a relationship-building book together. I know, it might
sound like "work" to you or your spouse, but it can be fun, and a
great investment of your time together. Maybe it will consist of you reading to
your spouse before bed. Or taking turns reading a chapter to each other once a
week. I tried for years to get my husband to read through a relationship book
with me and finally he insisted on writing
a couples book with me that he -- and other men -- would enjoy reading (When Couples Walk Together)! Working
through a devotional book together will
help you see deeper into your spouse's heart, as well as your own.
5.
Pray together regularly. We've heard
this advice as often as you have, but it took us years to get to that place. We
will admit that, even as a couple in ministry (my husband is a pastor), it's
difficult to find concentrated time to pray together.
But when we started spending just a few minutes praying together before
work in the morning, we found that a short prayer also included a hand held,
two hearts shared, and a connection with God together that made all the
difference in our day. If it's still a struggle in your marriage, pray about how
the two of you can make time to pray together.
What will you do in 2015 to cultivate a closer connection with your spouse?
I'd love to hear your ideas in the comment section below.
Would you like to get a free copy of Cindi's book, When Couples Walk Together? To enter the contest, leave a comment on this blog and Cindi will pick the winner by choosing the most creative or inspirational message. Have fun!
Would you like to get a free copy of Cindi's book, When Couples Walk Together? To enter the contest, leave a comment on this blog and Cindi will pick the winner by choosing the most creative or inspirational message. Have fun!
Cindi McMenamin is a national speaker
and author of several books including When a Woman Inspires Her Husband, When a Mom Inspires Her Daughter, and When Couples Walk Together, which she
co-authored with her husband, Hugh. For more information and free resources to
strengthen your soul or marriage, see her website: www.StrengthForTheSoul.com.
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