Vegas and Grandma

I hate this saying. (I bet you are thinking, Gee, Lori- tell me how you really feel.) Every time I see this post go up on Facebook, I feel myself getting all fired up! So... I decided to fight back! This (along with that awful VEGAS saying) is one of the worst life philosophies I have heard.

Some of you reading this may think I have gone off the deep end-taking it too far. After all...it's funny, kinda cute. 

In my opinion, it isn't cute, funny, or even harmless. It is dangerous. Why would grandparents want to teach and encourage their grand-kids to withhold experiences and information from their parents? (Frankly the children learn to lie soon enough on their own. It certainly doesn't need to be reinforced by Granny or Pappy.)

Having a sweet relationship with children doesn't need to be covert or deceitful. The grandchild-grandparent is special. It is another place a child can be loved unconditionally. It is also important that the grand-moms and grand-dads remember to support their children in their efforts to raise their children.

So that is my word of recommendation for today. If you have utilized the "What happens at Grandma's" idea before, please rethink your position. Maybe even discuss it with your own adult children.

On the flip side: Parents- lighten up a bit, be a little flexible, and give your folks space to use what I call, The Grandparent Option. Maybe some of the "rules" can be loosened a bit when your kids are with the grandparents.

A relationship doesn't need to be clandestine to be GREAT.

Do not deceive one another. 

Leviticus 19:11c

The Lie

It is better to deal with dirt and grime immediately rather than later. Don't you agree? I find waiting means tougher scrubbing, built up scum, and possible stains.

 Life is like that, too. Dealing with our mistakes or sins or dealing with our children's mistakes or sins should occur sooner rather than later. The mess is  contained, easier to address.

There are times we may want to look away, not tackle the issues at hand.

Denial, lack of time, fear... all play a possible role in avoiding a problem.

I love how Jesus dealt with the woman at the well (John 4). He went out of his way to speak with her, met her where she was, demonstrated love and concern, and spoke truth. He timed it perfectly. He talked with her privately. No one else was within earshot. What a tender moment.

This is a tough thing to do, to love by showing mercy and grace while speaking truth. But that is what our kids need and frankly that is what we (by we... I mean I) need.

Our kids need us to take the time and to be brave. They need us to treat them respectfully during a hard conversation. If issues, big or small, are dealt with in truth and love there is a better chance of altered behavior and character growth. This approach will keep the relationship intact.

Don't listen to the enemy's lie, "If you address this problem you will lose your child."

PRAY.

Pray for your child's faith to blossom. Just as with the woman at the well, this is the main focus.

Then follow Jesus's example. Be truthful and loving in the midst of a challenge. And ...remember to be respectful so the relationship isn't damaged.

...keep hold of the deep truths of the faith with a clear conscience.

1 Timothy 3:9